Abide

Back in January I posted that I wanted to begin each month with a focus....a habit that I wanted to create or get rid of to make better use of my life.  The habit for February is a bit different than I typically choose when trying to better our life.  Usually I think of something practical to make my life a little easier to work on.  This is one I won't be able to really measure like another kind of habit such as marking something off a checklist.

I've mentioned in some previous posts, that I am really struggling more so this winter with joy and being content. Feelings of frustration, blah, inadequacy, failure, etc have been crowding out the joy I desire to have.  After hitting a wall from 1) too much in my schedule 2) not enough time with the Lord, I simply had to tell the Lord I'm tired of spinning my wheels.  I need YOU to place the desires in my heart YOU want me to follow and YOU to place the joy in my heart.

Today He gave me two words to focus on...ABIDE and DELIGHT.  I'll focus on abide in this post and share delight in another.  I've read the verse in John 15:7 before but today the Lord wanted me to meditate and pray it.  First I had to even look up the word abide to know what it really means. I was surprised to find the meaning (I did also check to make sure the Greek meant the same)....to wait, await, to endure without yielding, to bear patiently, to accept without objection, to remain stable or in a fixed state, to conform to.  This makes this verse come alive for me....If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. John 15:7

Planning Ahead

One thing that working from home forces me to do is plan ahead.  I'm usually pretty good except when life changes and I have to go through a transition period.  I'm finally out of that transition period but something a friend suggested made a huge difference in getting me out of that "getting by one day at a time" mentality.  Some seasons of life are like that and it's ok!

Her suggestion?  Plan 8 weeks at a time with the holidays around the corner.  It may sound overwhelming but has been the absolute best thing I've done recently.  However, you can modify it to be monthly.  I plan to do it according to our school year or my business quarters once the new year starts.  

Here's how I did it...

1) printed off 8 weekly plan sheets with time boxes.  This one here would work great, only modified a bit for you.  This is one I use for my business so its got MK on it.  You could create a similar one in excel spreadsheet but this gives you a visual.  I literally color coded my weeks.  Anything that was already "set in stone" went on there and then I made updates and adjustments as need.
2) Create a Master List for each month.  I used this.  It is the most freeing thing to write down absolutely everything you need to do.  It stresses me out to keep it in my head!
3) Create a deadline or day you'd like to put your master list into action.  I used something similar to this.  Print out 8 copies so you can fill in the dates and mark when you want to do a project or item.  I can't even tell you how awesome it is to assign a day to a task!  Then I don't have to worry when I'm going to get it done.
4) Each Sunday night I look to see what I need to do, fill in some more items, and get a daily sheet ready for each day.  I personally use a small notebook for each day because filling out a paper didn't work as well for me.  Either way is great!  You definitely want to have a daily plan.  I've been doing this method for years and I get so much more accomplished on the days I do it.
5) Each evening review what you did not get done and move any items on to the next day or another day in the week that would work better.  Fill in your next day's sheet.

My November went so much smoother than any month I can remember in the last year!  I love this system all thanks to the awesome binder idea I created.

Some tips I've learned along the way...
* Don't overschedule your day.  Prioritize your list into "must do" and "would like to do".  I don't worry about the 2nd list unless I have free time.  My main goal is the "must do" and sometimes that even includes spending 30 min of alone time with each child.  It doesn't always mean a household or business item.
*Keep your busy, out of the house days very simple!  Every other Tuesdays and every Thursday are days that I cannot make a to do list because all I can get done is teaching my kids School then we are out the door for classes in town (Art and PE).  I may only put simple items on those days.  I try to do most of my items when I'm going to be home all day.
*It will take time to get used to a new system.

I hope these tips will encourage you and help you through this busy time of year!  It's been a very refreshing and helpful way to organize my life lately.

Plan in Action

Ok, so I said I want to simplify so here are some baby steps we are taking this week....

*Cancelling Netflix like I mentioned (there is a chance we'll keep it 2 more weeks to get our full month's payment that has already been paid).

*Technology free zones - this is when we will turn our phones off and shut the computer down.  (We are able to shut our phones down because we still have a landline and our family always calls us on this so if you ever need us, look up our phone number and you can reach us on that). If you decide to implement this in your home you may also need to add...TV and gaming systems.  Phones and computer are more of a distraction in our home so that is our focus.  The TV only comes on after the kids are in bed and we are ready to just relax for the evening with a movie or TV show.  Technology free zones will be (for the most part) during these times....
        *School for the boys
        *On evenings that everyone is home together (3-4 times per week)
        *Most Sundays
This does not mean we will become legalistic to a "rule" but more of a guideline so we stop mindlessly checking texts and being online when we are home together.  Since I run a business I can be answering texts and emails all evening sometimes so this will put an end to me becoming distracted in this way.  Working from home and can feel like I'm never "off" work so I have to put those boundaries in.

This set-up allows us to be available to our phones and emails during most of the day and on evenings that we are not together.  When I'm working in the evenings and after the kids are in bed, Jeff will have his time to surf the net or just be available to answer calls and texts because it doesn't take time away from each other. Or we might decide to research vacations together online.  So it just means when we do get online, its a conscious decision to do so and not just something we do out of habit or avoidance to what is important.  

*A note to moms who stay at home and find the internet or phone distracting....this is a hard one because we can get lonely at home and then we feel guilty for checking facebook multiple times a day or reading blogs, etc.  Here's my thoughts on this....plan time to do this so you don't feel guilty about it.  Plan your work, do it and then have the freedom to grab a hot drink, blanket and your laptop to do some online fun.  Watch your favorite TV show if you wouldn't be embarrassed to share you watch it with others.  :)  My plan for this is to create a plan and reward myself with online time.  Each day I will have an A list of must do that will get done as early in the day as possible.  Next up I create a "B" list that is a should do.  I also want to make sure this is done before I mindlessly get online to avoid my list.  Then a C list is want list and is only if you want to get to it.  You must realize that you cannot and will not get everything done....so stop trying!  An exception to this is that I have a quiet time scheduled in my house where we all go to our rooms for quiet playing, nap, etc.  During this time I will get online even if my A list isn't done simply because I do homeschool and usually put in a full morning's work and allow myself some down time either reading, watching a movie or getting online.

*Oh, one more thing.  We are planning to actually take some junk laying around to Goodwill this week.  The junk that's been sitting out for months just waiting to go.  That will help me feel like our space is being better used!

Longing to Simplify - Part 3

The last part of our simplifying process is to spend more quality time together.  We can get so caught up in life that we truly miss time together.  I long for this!

Our plan....eliminate distractions....

Netflix - will be cancelled this month for at least 30 days where we will evaluate at the end of that 30 days.
Boundaries online - I'd love to hear "rules" you set for yourself.  We've not set our boundaries yet but something we are going to discuss on our date soon.

Part 2 of plan....add traditions/memories....

I'd love to hear from you on this as we brainstorm together to see what we'd like to add to our life.  What do you do to make evenings fun at your home when you are all together?  Family nights?  Game nights?  Please send me your ideas!!  We've always had good intentions but never followed through to make some neat traditions on a regular basis.

Longing to Simplify - Part 2

As I'm thinking through this, I realize that I want to share 3 parts...so bear with me.  In this part of simplifying my life I want to focus on the stuff that has accumulated.  I hate clutter yet it still collects in my house.  So I'm on a mission to go through every single room and closet of my home to purge!  While this will take a long time, I think my husband is on board with me so I'll get to have his help.  Once this happens I want to do some re-decorating and updating to my house.  However, I can't think straight until stuff I don't like leaves.  Here's my general plan...

Kitchen - go through my cluttered drawers and cupboards to rid of those items I don't ever use.  I'm sure I have duplicates accumulating.  I hate it that I have a hard time shutting one drawer in particular.  My tupperware/container cupboard drives me nut as well as my lazy susan and corner cabinet that I can't seem to figure out how to organize.  I also have a huge pantry but know I'm not utilizing the space right.

Toy Closet - I really think we could get rid of nearly every toy of the boys except a few they play with all the time.  I think they've outgrown many of them that we haven't gotten rid of.  I like it that we don't have a toy room because it forces us to keep toys to a minimal.

Office - oh how I need some major help in this area!  My files need updated and so many things need thrown out.  Running a business requires organization and when I get behind this area can get bad really fast!

Bedroom - I want to eliminate as much as I can here.  I want to walk in and feel peaceful and right now I do not!

I also have 2 areas that collect stray stuff.  That needs to change!

See, I have my work cut out for me!!

Longing to Simplify - Part 1

Crazy as it sounds homeschooling has really simplified my life.  When I am home teaching my kids, I can't be involved in other daytime activities.  I haven't been home this much in years!  For the last few years both boys went to preschool 25 min from our home which took me out of the house 2-3 mornings a week (depending on how old they were).  I was then involved in a mom group so I was gone at least 3 mornings a week which didn't leave me much time at home at all.  I start to feel stressed when I'm not home at least every other day.  I also start to go stir crazy if I can't get out every other day!  I can't remember my life where I had to be home every single day.  Aside from field trips, errands, etc I try to keep a routine for the boys so we get our schooling done every morning.  Sometimes it doesn't fit into a perfect schedule or routine but for the most part it does stay pretty consistent.  I do enjoy the simplicity of my daytime routine.

Here's what that looks like...

Morning routines

School

Lunch

Quiet time (boys get to play in their room and mom gets time alone)

Work Time -Boys finish up any work they didn't get finished before lunch independently (all my teaching is done at the beginning of the morning so at the end is independent work).  While they finish up, I work in my office.  They have desks in my office so we all pretty much work in the same area together.  If the boys get their work done they usually start on some project like writing a book, coloring, drawing, etc.  I love how they find things to do on their own.  This is why our TV is only on at scheduled times or they would be watching all day.  In fact I'm still not sure why they always ask to turn it on as if I'm going to change my mind.   

Afternoon Routine/Chores - still working on getting this into a good rhythm.  I haven't been very good about this as it seems like I get distracted on other things that take my time.  

Evenings - this varies.  We have church, my work & ministry schedule as well as a once a month homeschool Bible study.  Some weeks I am only gone once while a busy week would have me away 3 times.  The boys don't mind since they are home with me all day and they get to have a "boys' night" as they call it.  That usually means they do things they don't do when I'm home for the evening like play video games with dad, work on his barn, etc.  

I really have loved our new schedule.  Disclaimer:  This does not mean that homeschooling is always peaceful or that I have figured it out completely.  We have had a much better week and are getting into a good rhythm but there are still homeschool stresses that haven't been worked out yet.  

Tomorrow I want to share the next phase of simplifying my life that has to do with getting rid of things.  Since I'm home more now, specific areas of my home are driving me nuts and it's time to purge!!